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July 11, 2006

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Elena

I forgot a story from days gone by and tuhgoht I would toss it into this blog!LOL!I was a senior in HS and me and group of gf's had snuck off(imagine that!) and drove 45 mins. away to go to this happening dance club in the bad side of Fresno. Of course, my gf Janet was driving( think real blonde ) and she got us lost leaving the club(no alcohol was even involved!).We ended up deeper into the cesspool of Fresno and what did we stumble upon?HOOKERS!!! About 5 of them strutting up and down the street. Being inquisitive(as I still am) and blunt ( duh, you have read my words!LOL!) I made my gf pull her mothers station wagon over and talk to the hookers. Of course one of them leaned into the window of the drivers side and asked what are you girls looking for- a party? . To which I replied yeah, do ya' know where one is? This hooker .was about 5 foot 11( now that I think about it, was probably a trannie, but at 17-wtf did I know about trannies?LOL). Wearing a super short yellow mini dress with ripped fishnets and stilletto heels. Her face was aged so badly I coulda swore she was in her 70 s(anything over 30 was old to me then!LOL!). I (stupidly) asked her her age and she replied 25. To which I replied, yeah right, about 40 years ago .I then made the stupid mistake of asking how much a man would pay for sex with her(god I didn't know when to shut the hell up!). She replied , $50 for around the world . Before I could even THINK .it came outta my mouth! My gf's all looked at me, cause ..well, they knew me well and realized I was about to stick my fuckin' foot in my mouth I replied, WOW! That much for 10-20 mins ? That much for someone that looks like (yes I did!) YOU? Men SURELY have no taste if they are gonna pay THAT much for banging YOU . It was then that my gf Stephanie kicked the shit outta me and turned to me with a deer in the headlights look and my gf Janet(the driver) screamed Shit, she's got a GUN! .That's right! I looked back to the left and that crack whore lookin elderly tranny lookin hooker was holding a GUN!! She started cussing at us and waving the gun at us . Janet put pedal to the metal and we flew like a bat outta hell, but .not before my stupid ass threw a handful of PENNIES outta the car window ( yeah, sometimes I just don't think!LOL!). The geriatric, gun wielding tranny hooker was chasing us down the street stumbling in her stillettos as we blew through a red light. Man .now that I think about it, we were damn lucky she didn't blow our fuckin heads off! Man, my mother woulda been pissed if I woulda been shot by a hooker then grounded my ass for life for sneaking to Fresno to go dancing!LOL!So, my suggestion never EVER EVER mouth off to a hooker!

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